Seeing that it is the holiday season, ol' Mathdude here is going to hook you up with his favorite Christmas songs.
First up: Darlene Love's Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home). Each Christmas Eve, Jay Thomas goes on the David Letterman Show, and he and Dave have a contest to see who can hit the star off the top of the Christmas tree with a football. Jay always wins. Then the show closes with Darlene singing. They've been doing that every year for 10 or 12 years or some shit like that.
Next: Band-Aid's Do They Know It's Christmas? This was Bob Geldoff's baby back in the 80s to raise money for African starvation relief. It was subsequently copied by the asshole American We Are The World movement. This song is infinitely hipper, and actually infinitely better in every way than We Are The World.
Finally, I have Weird Al's Christmas At Ground Zero. Not hearing about me putting the Ramone's Blitzkrieg Bop on my mom's Cats cassette, my in-laws asked me many years ago to tape some Christmas CDs they had because they didn't own a CD player. I snuck this onto the end of the tape, like I did with Blitzkrieg Bop. Only they never called me on it.
Well that's about i- Oh my God, everyone, you won't believe what just happened! It's a Christmas Miracle! Dr. Zibbs of That Blue Yak just came through the door! How awesome is that?
Me: Zibbs! What's happening?
Zibbs: Bubble-up!
Me: Dude, this is perfect timing. How about you take over while I go watch me some Judge Judy?
Zibbs: Bubble up!
Me: Awesome! Ladies and gentlemen: Dr. Zibbs!
*looks around* Nice spread you have here Mathdude. I see you're giving away music from your collection. What else do you have in there? Hmm. Here's one. If you're at work right now, I want you to download and play the Surfari's Wipe Out, and turn up the volume of your computer all the way. Jump up on your desk and dance along. You can do the Mash Potato, the Swim, or that Lawn Sprinkler dance. Then when they get to the drum part, I want you to play the butt bongos. Just turn facing away from your audience, and spank your bottom as though it were a bongo drum. That ought to get the party started. I do this all the time where I work at Christmas.
Let's see, what else is here? Oooh, here's a good one, Blotto's Too Much Fun. That's a lot like Wipe Out. You should dance on your desk for that one too!
What else...well, since I have the Blotto out, wait. Ahem, um, Beth, there's a big story on CNN.com about REM. Something about the band breaking up. You should check it out........... Ok, good, she's gone. The rest of you should listen to Blotto's Metalhead. It's a hoot, and it makes fun of heavy metal heads. I just didn't want to encour- Oops, she's coming back...
Ok, I gotta get back to ol' West Chester people. You guys stop on by, ok?
Bubble-Up!
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
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12 comments:
Are you high?
And also, I'd like one of those beautifully designed shirts on your sidebar for "hosting".
Didn't you fill out the paperwork with Darlene in payroll?
hahahahahah "are you high?"
"are you high?"
I've been asking him that question for 44 years...
You are one weird dude.
Do you have to ask if he's high??
I have an unhealthy obsession with Christmas music. In the most ego-shattering way possible.
Every time I hear Chicago's "Little Drummer Boy," I cry.
And I don't fucking cry.
..at least you can make a list.
Poor Jewish people only have that Adam Sandler song.
Flawed: High on life!
TA: You're just bitter from having lived in my shadow all your life!
Red: Oh, yeah? Well, you're weird!
BE: See above.
Rassles: Um, ok (awkward). Thanks for sharing.
Moooooog: I forgot about the Hanauka song. Good call.
What? R.E.M.'s breaking up? *hurries out the door*
I downloaded.
I listened.
Thank the great Lord for R.E.M.
I love Darlene Love's Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home); I have a couple recordings of her Letterman appearances, if you want. Gotta clean out that metal in your ears.
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