Happy Birthday Falwless!

One of the funniest blog postings on the innernets ever was last year's Happy Birthday to myself posting by Falwless. She has practically fallen off the blogging world* (as I have, at least here anyways) and she currently is going through personal stuff, but I hope she has a Happy Birthday nonetheless.

My first impression of her was one of confusion. I couldn't understand why someone would use such a hideous child picture of herself as an avatar. Eventually it morphed into the eyepatch and monkey one she uses today, and I got it.

Her Monday Caption Contests back in the day were pretty awesome, and I worked hard to win, like, every other one. Others were jealous of my obvious superiority and the accumulating trophies, so Falwless had to end the contests.

Many of you may remember that she was the first blogger to guest post here at Eating Chicken Vindaloo. Man, she was really on that day. And then pretending that it wasn't her - the work of sheer genius.

I'm friends with Falwless on Facebook - she uses Falwless Jones as her name there, in case you want to be friends with her too**. Her real name, though, is Ethel McFugly. There, it's out. The whole world knows now, Ethel. Kids can be cruel, sure, but I'm positive nobody's going to make fun of your name now that we're all grown up! Trust me on this one.


Even though she lives a mere 3 hours away, she has resisted meeting up with me when I pass by. Maybe when those restraining orders expire we'll meet up.

All kidding aside, Happy Birthday Falwless!


*2008 - 242 posts, 2009 - 8. That's right, 8!
**Relax Fal, only 3 people read this blog. It's not like you're going to be inundated with Friend requests.

Enough!

Enough already with Michael Jackson!  I freely admit to not being a fan of his.  I readily concede that a great many loved his music.  I get that.  To paraphrase Charles Barkley, though, he is not a role model.  Unless, of course, you're goal in life is to be a train wreck.  

We've all heard of the child molestation allegations.  I'm 60-40, maybe 70-30, of the belief that he was not guilty.  I'm more convinced that he was just a weird, fucked-up dude, not a child molester.  As for the rest of his life: Train Wreck!  He had serious, serious self-image problems.  Unfortunately, he was wealthy enough to ruin his physical appearance.  Is there anyone you can think of anyone who has purposely more hideously disfigured himself or herself?  I can't.

He clearly didn't handle his fame and fortune well either.  The examples are too numerous to go over here.

Finally, he is now dead because of his own stupidity.  He believed taking Diprivan would help him sleep (at least that's what's believe at this time).  He had no rational basis for believing this, and yet he did.  Is this a role model for you or your loved ones?  I didn't think so.

Entertainers entertain us.  That's all they do.  George Carlin died last year, and you didn't see me holding goofy vigils or crying for the cameras.  Get over it, people.  Michael Jackson's dead.  Maybe he's finally found peace in the great beyond.  How about focusing on something really important?  Do something nice for the people that helped raised you.  Say thanks to a coach or a music teacher who you looked up to, or things along those lines.  I guarantee you, Michael Jackson will be as forgotten years from now as Elvis Presley is now.